Top stories of Bolega Bharat Competition by MS Talks
It is sadly common for women to experience some kind of abuse in their lifetime. Be it emotional abuse, physical abuse, mental abuse, sexual abuse, or financial abuse. The violence you faced from your partner is by far the most shocking experience for a woman since she instilled her trust in a person who not only betrayed it but also left visible marks of his betrayal.
Shikha Bajaj from Mumbai was leaving a perfect life with her parents. Brought up in a middle-class family who believed in the power of relationships and a firm believer in the institution of marriage. But soon her dreams were shattered. Here’s she sharing her own experience of domestic violence and how she empowered herself against it.
“I was only 23 when I got married. I was too innocent and too delicate at that time to know much about the world. With a lot of dreams in my eyes, I left my parents’ house to go and stay with my husband, not aware of what is coming up next. The man I got married to, he never loved me. He never respected any woman in his life.
I was a victim of domestic violence. All my dreams got shattered when I opened my eyes and found myself in the hospital bed. I hated the sight of my parents looking at me in sympathy. Trust me, more than the physical pain, my pain was mental. I did not know why this all happened to me. Just two months into the marriage, I was on the hospital bed. I did not even experience what marriage means. My parents got me home from there. I was definitely in a lot of pain both mentally and physically.
I was slipping into depression and I did not want to live. There were so many questions the society had for me. The society asked, “What happened? Why did not you do anything about your problem? Did not parents of your husband stop him from misbehavior?”
So many questions people asked me. I did not want to answer to anybody. I was already in pain. Maybe I did not have answers.
One fine day, my mother came to me. She held my hand and said, “Relationships are important but you are more important. Because, if you are not there, the relation does not matter.” Trust me, this hit me very hard. For the first time, I felt that I was important. I felt so supported. I felt loved. And that was the day, I promised my mother that I will do everything to keep myself happy. I will not end my life like this.
I picked up a job and I started working for myself. I kept myself busy. Years passed by. I did a lot of courses and attended a lot of meetings. I watched a lot of inspirational videos. I came in contact with a lot of mentors who helped me come out of it. And as I say, the time is a big healer. I am much stronger and much confident today. I am thankful for God that he gave me this opportunity. Maybe this was my Karma that I had to face such problems. I am very thankful that I could move on from my misery. I have such a lovely family that supported me and I bounced back to life.
Today, I am a corporate trainer, also a coach and counselor. I coach a lot of people on relationships also. I tell everybody that never forget you are important. I could not do much to that man and he did whatever he wanted because I allowed him to. So, take back that power. Your happiness is in your hands. Do anything that makes you happy and does not let anybody to take that happiness away. No relationship, no job, nothing. Remember that you are important and you deserve the best in life. You deserve to be happy. You deserve to be loved. You are special and you are important. So is each one of us. Remember that, and to top it all this, do not expect anybody to love you if you do not love yourself. So begin and shower yourself with love and do things that make you happy. Trust me, this life is worth it. You are special. So, stay safe and stay strong.
Shikha Bajaj has solved her problems only because of her `Zidd’ and now she encourages others to turn their pain into power and overcome their circumstances.